Blind Arrogance

I used to think that the gods had plans for me
(how arrogant is that?)

and that plan
was to create family
out of a group of people
whose only connection
would be me....


I did it for years in the east
when I was the Baby
and I started again
when I came out here
and became the WyzWmn

things
for the most part
went along swimmingly
for a long time

I now know that was likely
because I was blindly arrogant

I volunteered for charity
for years
I also became an officer
in a riding club
for years
and as a result
of all that and more
became "fast friends"
with a huge group of people
all over the world

I sub-consciously saw myself acting
as a fulcrum
to bring these people
from different walks of life
together

During the process
I learned a lot about myself

I learned that I don't suffer fools
or drunks lightly

I learned that I'm gregarious
but still shy

I learned that I'm strong
but usually terrified

I learned that I'm able to intimidate people
with my words
as opposed to my fists
but the fists are still there
should the need arise...

I learned that I'm a story teller
not a writer

I learned that I hold most dear
morality, integrity, honesty,
principles, sincerity, goodness,
kindness, honour, trustworthiness
and truth

and that the words "respect"
and "family" are two
of the most maligned
misused words
in the English language.

I learned that it
turns out I was wrong
that it turns out
that I was blindly arrogant
that it turns out
that's not what the god's
had in store for me

I learned that I gain power from myself
from expressing myself with integrity...

and that as my horoscope for today says:
"The depth of my convictions are intense
and I should not be afraid to say
what is on my mind
to confirm for others
exactly where I stand"