Sunday, July 25, 2010

Bewitched...

remember Bewitched?

Elizabeth Montgomery as Samantha Stephens?

ya know how yer mind has a tendency to wander
when yer stuck in a laundromat
with a bunch of strangers
for a couple of hours?

everyone studiously ignoring each other
whilst surreptitiously peeking
at each other "unmentionables"?

I listen to music
iPod's rock in the laundromat!

quite often sitting with my eyes closed
so as to not see the condition of
everyone else's unmentionables
and on the off chance
that my not looking at theirs
will keep them from looking at mine...

today whilst washing
yet again
the down comforter
that I've had but a month
and Pixie seems to believe
is her personal pissing gound
but I digress....

anyway...
today's closed eyes
rocking and rolling
thought patterns
led me to be thinking of
my friend Louie's blog
on the abject stupidity
of drinking and driving
or even more so
drinking and riding
(It's called "Impaired Thinking"
and ya really oughta read it)

then my thoughts turned
to the kind of punishment
that people get
for impaired driving

which then of course
led me to thinking
about consequences
for actions in general

which eventually led me to
the thought that named this post

wouldn't it be great if I
had a Samantha Stephens' type nose?

get caught speeding?
wiggle wiggle wiggle
yer a tortoise

get caught impaired?
wiggle wiggle wiggle
yer a skunk

get caught stealing?
wiggle wiggle wiggle
yer a magpie

the mind boggles...

then of course
as things will happen
my thoughts turn to the people
that have hurt and disappointed me
over the last couple of years

hmmmmm
Samantha Stephens nose....

hurt your wife?
wiggle wiggle wiggle
yer a eunuch

hurt your children?
wiggle wiggle wiggle
yer a monkey

lie to people
wiggle wiggle wiggle
you have no mouth

talk behind people's back
wiggle wiggle wiggle
you have no mouth

be mean
wiggle wiggle wiggle
yer a bird in a cage...

I could go on forever
*sigh*

yet more proof
that I'm going to hell
as the VOD would say...

LoL

2 comments:

Louie said...

I'll save you a bed of nails in Hell (you know, *down there*) It'll be hot, but living in P.A. without access to my pool has prepared me well.
LYLT5$

Anonymous said...

But what happens if the nose happens to get itchy......