I read this sign

on my way home from work
it said
"there are no strangers here....
just friends we've yet to meet"

nice sentiment eh?
all kinda warm and snugly
and airy fairy....

well.... it's bullshit!

if I've learned anything over the last couple of years
it's that friends don't grow on trees
acquaintances do though
and just because someone says they are your friend
doesn't mean that you can rely on them
to be in your corner when the chips are down

what constitutes a friend?

Someone of good moral standards...
Someone who knows the difference between
right and wrong
and strives to spend as much of their life on the right side
as humanly possible...instead of paying lip service
to the very idea...

Someone who understands
that there is no grey area
around lying
(and yes...not telling the whole truth
is still a lie...commonly called a sin of omission)
any more than there is around
stealing,
being disrespectful,
mean spirited
or cruel.

Someone who not only talks the talk
but walks the walk...full time.

Someone who makes a commitment to you
and then stands by it - even if it costs them

Someone who doesn't decide to make you
bear the brunt of the burden
when they make a mistake

Someone who does things for you
not to just make themselves look better
but just cos they want to make you happy

Someone who doesn't re-write history
to make themselves feel better instead of
stepping up and taking the heat when
they've caused it.

Someone who doesn't try to manipulate you
or those around you

Someone who doesn't think kindness is something
you put on toast only to be pulled out and served
when they'd best profit from it.

Someone who doesn't sneak in here
in a clandestine manner
thinking I'll never know
they still read my blog....

A friend, accepts you
and supports you
A friend is kind, and loving
respectful and caring
and laughs with you not at you.

Strangers are not friends
as a matter of fact
most acquaintances aren't either

Trust used to come easy to me
but I've learned that lesson too

and figuring all this out
makes life so much more
drama free.

Really.