The road to hell is paved with good intentions…

Yet another old cliché for me to fall back upon

I want to begin this by saying I don’t think that people
are generally malicious by nature
(give or take the occasional pompous ass)

but I really don’t think that as a rule
people sit up nights
looking for ways to fuck each other over

I do think that they are self centered by nature and
and as a result hurtful,
because I think this way…

I also think that it’s my responsibility to
teach people how I want to be treated….
cos people can’t walk on me like I’m the carpet
unless I lie down on the floor.

Easter weekend was a busy weekend for me
what with friends in town from off island
family here from up island
and a renewal of friendships before the riding season
...er so I thought

It was great to see my old friend from off Island
and it was fun to spend time with family
but the results of the renewal of friendships before the riding season has me sad and feeling somewhat used

and it’s made me understand yet again
that there are consequences for every action
we purposefully or impulsively take in our lives
either way…there’s consequences.

to my way of thinking
a person can do something
with the best of intentions
but if they don’t pause to think out the consequences
of their actions
the results can be devastating for someone…

most specifically if the perception is
that this person did something
behind a friend’s back
and the friend get’s hurt

And then if that same person
spends the evening
saying out loud
that they were able to keep
"certain undesirable people”
from attending the get together…
and specifying whom
and that they did so
by sending out private invitations
to only the people
they wanted to see…

then what else are we to conclude
but that one of the people that was not invited
would be the friend who’s feelings got hurt?

See…also to my way of thinking…
and again also just my own cracker box thoughts…

one would be better served to have called the hurt friend
in the beginning and saying “we are having a party
and I’d really like you to come
but I need to let you know that “so and so” will be there
and I know you have a bone of contention
with that person but her husband is a close friend of the guest of honor”

Wouldn’t facing the issue head on
and sharing it right up front
be less hurtful in all camps
and for everyone involved
in the long run?

And once again (at the risk of repeating myself)

when ya make a mistake...
more than half the battle is to say
“I fucked up”
and then shut up
and accept the consequences of one’s action
as opposed to compounding the issue
by overly justifying
their so called “reasons”
for the action after the fact.

If you hurt someone’s feelings
isn’t the best course of action
to apologize and accept the consequences for your action
than to have to deal with all the turmoil
the action caused in your life in the first place?

Specially if you truly care about the person you’ve hurt?

I don’t get how getting defensive when called on your actions
could make people view you as less than incorrect…

Well
it seems to me that it should...
but what the hell do I know?
these are only my thoughts
and I get called on them
every damn day…

I keep hearing the feedback
about the difference
between friends and acquaintances…

if that’s how you can get
your personal ethics
around a lack of same in others
good for you….

but in my books
friends are people
that don’t try to fuck you over
or hurt your feelings
by hiding the truth

friends are people
that don’t play games
that may be perceived
as behind your back

I guess this is why
I’m never gonna be able
to have a gathering
in my home
cos I am so not exclusive
when it comes to my friends

yet according to some...
I'd be the all knowing all seeing
Satanic power behind every
wrong doing in the universe
from here to eternity...

Pah!
what the hell do I know?
I’m gonna just stay low n keep moving

and hope against hope
I don’t hurt anyone
on the way