Spectacles,Testicles....

Spectacles, Testicles.....wallet and watch

a little ditty the fadder used to mutter
prior to leaving the house
each day
just to remind himself to check and see
that he has all he needs
prior to departure

I am reminded of this little ditty
not because of my interest in testicles
or wallets or watches
but because I am once again on a quest
for eyeglass frames

I wear funky 3 dimensional eyeglasses
most people couldn't wear glasses like mine
but I can cos I don't have a hairdo to compete
with them....

I've worn these glasses for 6 years
they are very light weight titanium
and they are mottled gunmetal and pewter
that sort of change color when you look at them

but they are broken
part of the frame broke a year ago
I tried to get them fixed
but there's only one guy in all of Canada
that can fix titanium eyeglasses
and he's a 3 day drive from my home
that's 3 days in one direction....

so the eye Dr's assistant
ever so helpfully suggests
that I courier them to the guy
3 days drive away
to have them fixed
cos that'll only be
about 10 days
in total
she says....

uhmmmmm?
what should I do about seeing
while they are gone for 10 days?
shall I not work?
how about driving without my glasses?
watch tv?
see the sun?
hello?
hello?

I wanted to knock her on the side of the head
and ask "is this turned on?"

so in May I got my eyes tested
and I've been looking for eyeglasses ever since
I have searched high and low
and all I can find
are frames that are rectangular

you can get em in any color you want
but they are all rectangular
big rectangles
and little regtangles
plastic
or wire
or titanium
but rectangular

have I mentioned that I have a rather
large ROUND BALD HEAD?

oh
I'm yelling again....

today I got a call from the eye Dr's assistant
she's all excited cos "there's new trendy frames in
and I thought immediately of you"

I take part of the afternoon off
drive a half hour across town
to be presented with this:

http://www.zentyp.fr/fr/navigation.htm

now while these certainly are "trendy"
they are fucking rectangular

have I mentioned I have
a BIG ROUND BALD HEAD???

and frankly...green flowers do not a biker's glasses make
no matter what color my freakin motorcycle is!!!!